Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize