You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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