If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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