So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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