we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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