We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
me + whiskey = a bad person
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
So vagazzling was a success
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
