i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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