he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
