hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
