He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
