this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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