Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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