I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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