the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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