Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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