how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize