I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
