And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
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