Soap is not a condiment
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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