Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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