I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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