I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
wow bdsm is so cute
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