hotel room ftw
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.