The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
