So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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