What a fucking waste of an outfit
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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