I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
