I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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