Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
