She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
