He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
