i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
