So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
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we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
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not ubering you a puppy
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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