I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
