Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
