actually, I'm a sock model
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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