I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize