Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
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