the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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