...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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