I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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