At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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