Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
