David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
