he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
