it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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