Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize