All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
