just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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