I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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